win some lose some?

Have you ever thought, man I suck at friendships? Because lately I honestly think I suck. I don't know why I suck, but from the looks of it, I suck! I think I like people, I think I'm a good friend. I'm not saying I'm perfect, far from it but I do think I'm a good person. I'm a very internal person, I think a lot. I come across as disinterested, but really I am just shy. I don't want to say 50 words when 10 will do just fine. Which if I was honest, probably drives people nuts. I try really hard to not to make people mad at me. To the point that I actually take on too much. But I like balls in the air, I have become a really great juggler. I am starting to say NO but that is a very hard word for a jellyfish like myself.

I don't know. Do I really care? One friendship that I lost, does make me sad. One really wasn't a friendship, if I was honest with myself, so I don't but it irritates me because I like knowing what I did. I'm a tad crazy like that.

The purpose of this post? Not for people to say, yeah she's a good person but really just to get it off my chest. I think I'm going back in my bubble. I like my bubble. :) It has my true friends in it.