243 kilometers...

10 km run - CHECK
200 km bike ride - CHECK
32 km walk - CHECK!

Lot of money raised for the Alberta Cancer Foundation - CHECK

Incredibly proud chick - CHECK CHECK CHECK

Now I must go pop some blisters. Yes its a dream of mine. I have always wanted to pop or prepare 12 blisters on my feet. Fun times.

More later.

The Weekend to End BReast Cancer..

I've talked on and on and on about the Underwear Affair, the Ride to Conquer Cancer, but I really didn't say much about the Weekend to End Breast Cancer.

In two days, without much training, I'll be doing 38k in the one day of the weekend to End Breast Cancer. Wish me luck. It's going to be a hard walk that's for sure but it'll be fun.

I'll have my camera nice and charged for this one. Plus I'll be walking so it'll be much easier to take pictures.

Oh my.

And it's going to HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOTTTTTTTTTT!

WOOHOO...

Yippee dippy skippy..

I got my Martha book. And a canning/preserving book. And a backpack for hiking. And a dinner out (ok they screwed up the food and it was nasty but I didn't cook it so whatever)

Yay. I'm a pretty lucky girl.

It's my birthday...

It's my birthday .. woohoo..

32 wonderful and delightful years of me being on this earth. I was and still am a perfect person. Didn't cause my parents any problems any major problems, not even my mom. That 45 hour labour was easy. And she almost never, er once a year brings it up. My dad isn't around this year to say how he slept stayed up with mom for those 45 delightful hours. Yeah dad, I knew you were full of crap, but it's our little secret.

This year, I've had a pretty low key birthday. No hoopla for me. Just a lunch with my mom and the girls. Sal's bringing home dinner and a cake.

I got what I wanted. Although it made me cry like a waterfall. My mom framed two pictures of dad for me. They are my favorite pictures. One I carried in my back pocket my bike ride, and the other is my dad teaching me how to skip. Good memories.

I will say, I'm down 2 "events" have 3 left. I'll be honest those 3 are going to suck. But life goes on. I'm going to remember the good times. I can see clearly through the tears. I will always miss my daddy, he was a great man. Full of faults but he loved his family, he loved his life.

So dad, I missed your phone call today. I missed hearing your voice. I miss you trying to fill me with a crock of poop about how hard it was for you checking your eyelids for holes waiting up with mom for 40+ hours. I miss you. But it's my birthday and I'm not going to wallow in pity. I'm just going to say,

Happy birthday to me!!

Old at heart, young in age?

I realized last night that I'm old. Really old. I'm 32 years old, which is young, but I'm old. Or maybe just exhausted and well a mom.

Went to a friend of mines Stagette last night and was yawning at 8. Seriously, yawning. Thinking about my nice warm bed by 9 and was home, yep home by 11. Sad. I remember the "good old days" where you just needed a drink and a dj and you'd be set until morning. Granted two kids under 5 changes a lot. You use ALL the energy you have running around and playing barbies, and trying to not fall asleep by 3 let alone staying out past your bedtime - 10. Oh times have changed.

I did have fun, while I was awake. I was telling Sal last night, he missed prime houchy season last night. Wow, I didn't realize many many dresses only cover the va-jay-jay and that's it. I don't know how twenty something girls today do it. I would never have worn a dress that was so short that all my parts were almost showing. Crazy, kids today I tell ya *shaking my fist like an old woman * People watching is always enjoyable. I do love people watching.

I didn't drink, because not only am I old, I'm cheap. CHEAP. 8 for a drink seriously nuts. Oh well. Times have a changed I tell ya..

There ya go, the story of an old woman.

Goals!

I'm a believer of goals. I love goals. I write them down so I can see what I've achieved and what I have to work on. I'm not a believer in "failure" because I don't think you ever fail at things. They just morph into other things.

Walked with my mom last night and let me tell ya, biking or no biking the Weekend to End Breast Cancer next weekend is going to be hard. I have lost so much tone and stamina it's sad. But like I've said you just have to suck it up. Put some moleskin on your feet hotspots and walk. Because what is the slogan "Cancer is hard, walking isn't" It's true. Cancer is hard. Watching people around you have cancer, having to deal with unknown is brutal. I am very lucky that I haven't had it but in my "circle" I have 3 friends who are in my age group that are fighting it right now! That's 3 people aged 27-36 that have cancer. It's not an "old person" thing. It's an everybody disease.

Speaking of which, if you can spare a few prayers, please go read Kate's story, a beautiful young girl my oldest age has a brain tumor. How is that possible? I know it's possible, because I have a 2 year old cousin who has tumors in the eyes so this disease has no boundaries. Ahh..

Anyways off to the something, with the girls.. Should be fun.. Because isn't taking a 5 yr old and 3 yr old anywhere just joyous :)

Doing ok?

Maybe not. Maybe so.

I've decided to ignore my birthday this year. It's not a thing I'm embarrassed about, see I'll be 32, July 21st. And I'm happy about that but so far in the last 5 months we've done 5 family dinners and I can honestly say, I leave sad and angry. I don't want that for my birthday. I'm just postponing it until next year and I'm ok with that. Next year I'll be stronger. This year I don't want to have this big black hole where dad would be. So I'm not doing a family birthday with my mom/brother/sil etc, it'll just be me and a cake, and I'm ok with that, although I probably will cry, cuz It's my birthday and I can cry if I want to ;-)

I find myself starting this weird part of the grief pendulum where I'm sad and then fine in a space of 3 minutes. It's normal and I'm ok with it but weird things set me off. I was happy that I didn't have this overwhelming sadness on Dad's death-aversiry, July 8th but then when I realized I missed it huge guilt. Which is stupid, because you can't just stop living. Weird.

Training update: Walking tonight, hoping to get 10k in. Not much but have to start somewhere.

Under Reconstruction..

Please excuse the mess.

I'm trying to make my blog my own.

It's a rainy day here in Calgary and a no training day so I think de and re construction will be happening.

Need a name change..

I've changed.

I'm still just a girl with a bike and a dream.

But this blog has evolved more than I anticipated.

I really didn't believe that I'd fall in love with blogging. But I like boring people entertaining people with my crazy and somewhat scattered life.

So I need a facelift, a makeover, a name change.

Any ideas on names?

Still the same theme, I'm still a girl with tears a bike and a family that supports me..

Hmm..

Ramblings and Camping..

We did it. We went camping for the first time in 6 years. With kids.

I can honestly say once we got our crap together heads around the fact that camping is not the same as it once was, re: sitting in front of a campfire and drinking a beverage and reading a book we had a great time. But I will be the first to admit by about 5 Friday, I was ready to say experiment failed and go home. Then we, well I (as Sal whittled a spoon) realized that my kids don't sit for anyone even at home so why would they in the woods.

So we walked them, we hiked them, we nature'd them, we wore the little buggers out and in the process we wore ourselves out. Then we had the relaxing after the kids went to bed. Good lesson to learn.

Oh and an air mattress is a wonderful thing if tenting.

Now onto the other business at hand. Healthy living, revisited. Meal planning, check. I have my healthy meal plan for the next two weeks planned out. Exercise plan done. I will be nice to hubby and start it all after at least one monster is in bed, 3X a week. I found partners to help me re: get my butt off the couch, because they are waiting for me.

No! I don't want to be a stat..

Crap. Crap. Crap.

I can't believe I have do it again.

I have gained so much weight and fat that I have to redo it all again.

Why can't I just keep it off? Why do I do this to myself.

Ach. Ok that's enough whining.

It's been a rough 6 months. I've trained hard on the bike, but used it as an excuse to eat like crap. Dad got really sick, used it as an excuse. Dad died, had that as an excuse. No more excuses!

I need to lose 15 pounds. I need to lose the baby apron that keeps popping up.. I want NEED to wear bike shorts next year without cringing.

Have a plan. 3 steps.

Eat healthy again. I really miss that.
Walk 3/4 times a week - goal for the Kelowna Half Marathon in October
Bike once a week to keep the bike legs

By October I'll lose the weight
By June I'll be in those darn bike shorts!

Washboard ...

Abs? Wouldn't that be nice.. But nope this was my weekend..

My washing machine broke.. Seriously it no longer agitated. Which in turn made me agitated. Darn thing was whining for a week and I kept praying and asking it nicely to wait just 3 more weeks. But nope. It died. Went to the great big washing machine heaven.

My choices were limited. We didn't have a budget but we didn't want this

Off we went to Sears for a "cost effective" model. So no bells and whistles, no front loader for Jenny.

We now have a new washing machine.



and it will be here on Sunday.. 7 days.

Thank goodness for Mother in Laws houses. Shhh don't tell her :) 9 hours in a house being forced to do laundry makes for a very clean pile and pile and pile..

If I make it until

70 with my nose, I'll be shocked. I try to use an ample amount of sunscreen on the darn thing, but it sucks it up and then I burn. Oh well. Hopefully time and technology will be in my favor..

on another note, but still the same .. I have figured out what is worse than a sunburn on my nose, chaffed bum from a bike. And yes this is TMI, but gross. It's so flippin itchy. I used the butt balm the first day, but for some reason didn't the second and man my bum is chaffed and peeling and just plain disgusting.. So for all of you that are thinking about doing the Ride to Conquer Cancer next year, remember the butt balm. You will not regret it.. :)